life

As time goes by with living with cancer you do start to wonder what is it all for. You look back through your life and all the mistakes you have done and some times the mistakes you still do. Life isn't always the way you want it to be, all the dreams you may have had as a child. I was so naive at 16 and probably still the same at 26, I was very timid and shy I would rather be hurt than cause pain to some one else, not realising in many cases that they probably wouldn't have felt anything and I always came off worse. Now that my life is ending how many tears will these people shed for me, probably none. What is it all for really, we hold our inner thoughts in check, we go around in circles sometimes instead of being direct, we waste valuable time and yet we all do it, unless we are the heartless type. Maybe as my time gets shorter I might find the inner me and say exactly what I think and feel